What I learned from a philosopher busker...

...getting stuck, getting unstuck, and making shapes.

“To take one action is to exist, to be one point in space announcing itself. Another action? Well, two points make a line and a line is a journey in itself. Three points can create a shape, the most elegant and efficient 2D shape: a triangle. Just one more can turn those two dimensions into a 3d object. On and on it goes. Do you understand?

All this doesn’t have to be so complicated. To do is to create, doing is what brings the entire universe into being. One step at a time.”

My brain has been turning over this sentimnt ever since it was communicated to me in broken English last Friday, about halfway up Acropolis hill. I didn’t expect a perspective shifting philosophy lesson and I don’t know what it was that made this man stop playing his guitar, stand up and look me right in the eyes to deliver it. I’d stopped for a few moments to listen and to compliment a busker playing beautiful music in an incredible setting, but the way this wisdom inserted itself into my brain like a lost jigsaw piece felt kind of cosmic.

‘Constantinos’… I gave him the €7 I had in my pocket to buy his CD as he responded to my complimenting his music, “Oh I just play because it is natural for me, not for any other reason. If you enjoy it, that’s good for you.”

As I started asking more questions and digging deeper into his playing style and story, he seemed to pick up on my tendency to get lost in the pursuit of all the knowledge all the time. I looked down at the CD he’d handed to me. He told me he’d made this EP with his wife, a lyricist… but for some reason he’d included the formula for nuclear fusion within the credits on the inside sleeve, why?

“Because two! When one person creates, it is powerful. But when there are two, in balance and synchronisation, this isn’t only twice as powerful, it’s many times more powerful. Two being one can be as simple as humans in love (or in collaboration), or it can be as complicated as the energy that powers the sun. But no matter how deep we look, we’ll see the same answers and the same patterns that the philosophers…” he gestured up the hill towards the Parthenon, “…found thousands of years ago. Every new answer is only a retelling of the old. We look deeper and deeper and we find the same patterns.”

The energy that powers the sun:
Nuclear fusion occurs when two hydrogen atoms overcome their natural repulsion under the extreme heat and pressure of the Sun’s core. When they fuse, they form something new (helium), and in the process, a tiny bit of mass disappears - that missing mass is released as enormous energy.

Two simple things, when brought into just the right conditions, create something more powerful than either could be alone, and more powerful even than their combined mass should allow.

It’s not only additive it’s transformational.

That conversation stayed with me. And when I got home, it all clicked. I guess I’d only needed a nuclear blast of a revelation to shake me out of the funk that I’d been in for the first half of the year.

You may have noticed this is the first time I’ve written to you since January - If you’re a listener of my podcast DROPPED (2 episodes into season 2 at this point) then you’ll be a bit more up-to-date but otherwise it may have appeared like I’d dropped off the face of the planet for a while there - What happened is I had overthought myself into a corner in almost every way. Everything I was making felt like it would never be good enough, never be finished. I guess you could say I paralysed myself with perfectionism and anxiety all whilst a period of SAD induced brain fog and exhaustion was making me even less likely to be able to think myself out of it (or compose an email to update you on what felt like the opposite of what you signed up for). In hindsight my issue was that I was imagining the scale of everything I needed and wanted to achieve as one gigantic monolith, when all I really needed was to do was one thing, then another, and another, and another… Become a point, become a line, become a shape, become an object.

My creativity had been clouded by my career. I hadn’t protected myself as an artist from myself as the CEO of my own business.

The guy who needs to pay the bills was calling all the shots and using up all of the brainpower and something desperately needed to change.

So earlier this year I started offering to do some work outside of my own original music for the first time in 6 years, to separate my personal income from my art - I’ve been producing other artists and helping them finish their music, I’ve been audiobook editing with my pal Anna Pancaldi, I mastered an EP for my artist friend Jon Reynolds, I’m regularly engineering live sound at shows for Sofar Sounds, and I’m building a totally non-music-related business with my brother Simon. I’m applying the skills I’ve learned in music to other areas - they’re actually surprisingly transferrable - and despite it all I’m somehow feeling less burned out than I was before. In doing all this I’ve met a ton of talented artists, boosted my music production and editing ability and I’m now aching to apply that to my own music again and self-produce a new EP, maybe even an album. This time on my own terms - not to be controlled by the whims of a major record label. I took some action and I started to feel like I exist in the world again. I haven’t quite created my whole universe as I want it yet, but I’d say I’m at least at triangle stage by now. I’ve been on a journey of opening up to collaboration and community for a while now too, and not only for my own ends. To help other artists in their pursuits. The power of two.

Thank you for the chat and for the wisdom Constantinos; it helped me make sense of all of the above and it’s freed me to just do again. You guys will be the first to hear and see the fruits of all that when they come, as always.

Much love 🖤

-Matt

[📣 ***New music & details of a UK support tour next week are below this section]

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NEW MUSIC

As a DROPPED Podcast challenge at the end of season 1 I was asked to cover one of my cohost Greg Holdens songs. It was to be self-produced/mixed/mastered AND released by the beginning of season 2. Kryptonite to me.

I poured over this for probably way too long but in it I learned a lot about myself. Despite nothing ever feeling truly finished to me I put it out into the world and some people have been enjoying it. So that’s nice. Let me know what you think & listen to the lyrics to see if you can work out why I may have picked this song at that time 🕳️

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UK TOUR

Next week I’ll be joining US artist Michigander for 3 dates in the UK; Glasgow, Sheffield and London. I can’t wait to be out there in front of audiences remembering why I put myself through all of this behind-the-scenes BS again… 😂 come see me play and say hello if you can!

Much love 🖤

-Matt

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THE #1 BEST WAY TO JOIN MY MISSION TO KEEP MAKING MUSIC?

…PATREON!

Imagine that at the end of every month you've enjoyed my music, you can buy me a coffee or a pint as a thank you. That’s what being a member of my Patreon is like. Streaming services pay us fractions of pennies, but patrons like you keep independent music alive. 🫶

In return you’ll get access to an exclusive community on the Belle Mt. Patreon - where I share exclusive song demos, behind-the-scenes videos of my songwriting sessions, regular livestreams, previews of DROPPED podcast episodes, and much more. It's the best way to support my music - and you can join from as little as £4/$5 a month! I’d love to have you there.

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